Random Notes from a Crank

Rachel Maddow covered the imbecility of the Secretary of Education extensively in one of her shows, but the marketing gurus took it a step further with this Instagram post. 

That's some pretty good satire right there. 

I happened upon an interesting article from the BBC that talks about how people are using brewers spent grain. They're experimenting will turning it into food products and an alternative to leather. Check it out in "How Beer Sludge Is Being Turned into Vegan Milk and Leather." 

My word-of-the-day calendar shows that today's word as "mala fide," which is an adverb or adjective meaning "with or in bad faith." That word sums up a lot about the current administration in D.C. 

My club, Tottenham Hotspur, have a huge away game tomorrow. 

As much as I like Ange, if he doesn't win it all in the Europa League, I think he's going to get sacked. 

The team went through a dreadful spell for about three months when they had all kinds of injuries, but with the way he has turned again or criticized the fans, I don't think he'll survive for next season. 

But I hope to be proven wrong by him winning a trophy and Spurs doing well in the remaining games in the Premier League. 

Random Notes from a Crank

I found an image on a social media site. 

It says, "A straw man walking a red herring up a slippery slope on his way to the comment section." 

It's true. Reading the comments on a newspaper's site will make you understand how stupid the average person is, which reminds me about what George Carlin said.  

In areas that are likely to be hit hard by tariffs, the Canadian government has an ad campaign that is trying to educate dumb Americans. The New York Times has an interesting article about this move: "Canada Drops the Gloves in the Tariff Spat, Makes Its Case on U.S. Billboards." 

I hope the Democratic Party does something similar. 

Regardless, the last paragraph of that article is hilarious: "'Normally, Canadian fans come down on buses,' she said. 'I hope they know we like to have them. They sure are nicer than Philadelphia fans.'" 

Oh lady, travel and tourism to the U.S. is definitely taking a hit.

I saw that Soundgarden has been nominated three times for the Rock-n-Roll Hall of Fame and has not gotten in. That's a travesty. 

Vote for Soundgarden.

When we visited the Hall of Fame years ago, I think that was the year after Pearl Jam got in. And I remember this video playing "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" in which Prince just totally shreds. It's a great solo. 

Prince was a genius and an underrated guitar player. 

And then there's this. He brings the funk even better than the original. 

When we lived in St. Louis, Mrs. Nasty went to one of his concerts. I should have gone too. 

I need to reacquire Sign O' The Times. That's a great album. 

Happy National Beer Day. 

Random Notes from a Crank

Watching Northern Exposure with all its Red Hook beer advertising reminds me of one of my favorite breweries. I drank my fair share of Red Hook ESBs and Long Hammer IPAs. Strangely enough, I drank lots of Red Hook, a beer made in Seattle, when I lived in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. I've never seen it around these parts, unfortunately. And now they have all kinds of interesting IPAs that I can't get my hands on.

I searched for it on Binny's website, and all I got was squat.

I had forgotten how much I enjoyed that show, Northern Exposure. It has to be my favorite TV series of all time. I'm so glad Amazon made it available on Prime.

Because of a possible "wintry mix," the schools around here did not have have classes. All it did was rain. The silliness of people who aren't used to snow...

I've seen a trend recently of mid-size cities or larger cities making people their area's poet laureate. When did this move of laureating poets in places like Mobile and Mufreesboro start to happen? 

I'm not against it or anything. In fact, I like it because it supports the artistic community, but I'm just wondering when this trend started. 

Who started the laureating fire? And where else will it spread to? 

NPR has an interesting article out about the "Nones," who are apparently the largest group in the US in regard to religion. I fit into that group because I'm a highly skeptical agnostic.

The article is "Religious 'Nones' Are Now the Largest Single Group in the U.S." 

The good news to me is that this group is growing and they are likely to be liberal.  In addition, apparently Evangelicals is a group that's shrinking. More good news. 

Musing of the Moment: Harper's Indexes

Here are some interesting stats and numbers from the November and December Harper's Indexes:

• Percentage by which U.S. women are more likely than men to have a tattoo: 41
• Portion of U.S. adults with tattoos who regret getting at least one of them: 1/4
• Increase since 1984 in the median age of first-time U.S. home buyers: 7
• Portion of prospective U.S. home buyers who say they consider climate change when evaluating where to live: 4/5
• Percentage change this year in sales of Bud Light: -16
• In sales of Modelo Especial: +11
• Factor by which beer imports from Mexico have increased since 2013: 2
• Percentage by which beer imports from other countries have decreased: 29
• Percentage change in the divorce rate between 2008 and 2020: -31
• In the divorce rate between 2020 and 2022: +2
• Percentage of millennials who are not planning to get married: 21
• Of adult Gen-Z-ers who are not: 7
• Percentage of U.S. adults who say the political system is working "very" or "extremely" well: 4
• Who express little confidence in the future of the political system: 63
• Who say there is too little attention paid to the important issues facing the country: 78

I have noticed women tend to have more tattoos than men these days. I had a student write a paper years ago that went against the conventional wisdom that tattoos people get are there to show one's individuality. His take was that getting a tattoo was more of a herd mentality issue with many people getting the same kinds of tattoos (certain trends), especially women. 

The so-called conservative war against Bud Light because of a transgender spokesperson is so stupid. Apparently many of these Bud Light drinkers are switching to Modelo, which is humorous because during the Trump administration that company ran TV ads that were clearly trolling Moscow Don and his hateful speech about Mexicans and immigrants. That's some serious irony. 

The rise in the divorce rate obviously has a number of factors, but it's possible the pandemic was a significant cause--and possibly the support of a certain presidential candidate. But then again, that increase should have happened in 2016. Maybe it was because certain people voted for that charlatan a second time?

With the GOP having an advantage with having two Senators for dinky population states and the stupidity of not giving Puerto Rico and D.C. statehood and an uninformed citizenry voting for candidates for stupid reasons, it's no surprise 78% think the political system is not paying attention to climate change, economic inequality, pollution, the wage gap, educational issues, good jobs in the U.S., and other concerns. 

The House, for example, has done next to nothing for years under GOP leadership. Many members of Congress are more concerned about winning elections and raising campaign funds than actually doing something to make the country better. They just want to do some political hokum to get votes. 

The GOP asserts that the "government" doesn't work. Then they get control of a significant branch of it and show everyone that it doesn't work because of their leadership. A dog chasing its own tail. 

Random Notes from a Crank

The article about omicron and its spread in Denmark in the The Washington Post is a good one to read since the Danes are the best folks in the world to test and track the virus: "What Does the Omicron Variant Mean for a Highly Vaccinated Country? Denmark Has a Dire Answer." 

I checked the other day, and in my county in east central Illinois, only 43% are fully vaccinated. 77% of those 65 years and older are fully vaccinated, and 50% of those 18-64 are fully vaccinated. Those percentages are terrible. 

If you're interested in your own county or state, check out the Post's "Tracking the Covid Vaccine" link. 

I recently got a smoker, and I've spent the past two weekends smoking various meat. Last weekend it was a pork loin and then salmon fillets. This weekend it is spare ribs and then a whole duck.

I picked up a case of Sierra Nevada IPAs at Costco on our last visit. That is some great ale. It could be argued that Sierra Nevada is the brand that helped start the craft beer movement in the US.

Random Notes from a Crank

I have a hypothesis that coffee tastes better out of certain mugs than others. For example, I have a small coffee mug with a dish underneath that I've been using lately, and the coffee seems to taste better than other larger mugs. I wonder if there's any scientific evidence to back up my hypothesis? 

When you think about it, certain brewers recommend certain types of glassware for their beers. Sam Adams Boston Lager and Stella Artois come to mind with their specially made glasses. 

Then, of course, there's the Glencairn glass that serious whiskey drinkers use. 

But getting back to coffee, I need to get back to grinding my own each morning. It just tastes better. 

Random Notes from a Crank

With college football on Saturday and us doing stuff on Sunday, I forgot that Luke Cage was available on Netflix this past Friday. I'm only a few episodes in, but I like it a lot. 

One of my favorite classes I had as an undergrad was Mythology. I stumbled across this article via Scientific American the other day: "Scientists Trace Society's Myths to Primordial Origins." I like the research this person is doing, but you can see these patterns just by studying world mythologies. There are four types of creation myths and two types of fertility myths. Reading Campbell's The Hero with a Thousand Faces, Frazier's The Golden Bough, and Mencken's Treatise on the Gods can do everyone a lot of good. Reading those could certainly help people from saying their religion/mythology is the "right" one. 

One of my dad's stories that he has related over the years is that when he was in Iowa and went to bar and asked the waitress for a Griesedieck, he got slapped. The company is apparently going to open a brewery sometime soon. 

I read recently that ABC is reviving The Gong Show. I look forward to that. In that same article, the author relates that both the 20,000 Pyramid and The Match Game were aired this summer, and they'll be back. How the hell did I miss those? 

A listicle about the "20 Saddest Cities" came across my FB feed, so I figured to click away. Some of my quick takeaways are the following:

• Don't move to Ohio.
• I'm surprised St. Louis and Indy are on it.
• Knoxville is supposed to be great, I'm told.
• Detroit and Buffalo are not surprising.
• Same goes for Birmingham.
• I like Louisville, and how can it be sad with easy access to such a diversity of bourbon?  
• Memphis has the second-highest violent crime rate in the nation? Wow.

A Dog Visits a Beer Festival

As some of my readers know, I'm a fan of craft beers. So when I saw the video of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog's visit to the Great American Beer Festival, I thought I'd share. 

Culling the June Harper's Index

The June issue of Harper's has some interesting stats in its "Harper's Index" that I thought I'd share: 

• Percentage change in the past twenty-five years in the Consumer Price Index: +41
• In the price of beer: +40
• Percentage of U.S. college graduates who are women: 51.1  [This seems low to me.]
• Of Fortune 500 CEOs who are: 4.2
• Estimated amount by which federal tax revenue will increase if the Defense of Marriage Act is overturned: $35,000,000
• Percentage change since 1970 in the portion of U.S. children growing up in single-parent households: +133
• Amount awarded in March to a paraplegic man trapped for thirty minutes in Disneyland's "It's a Small World" ride: $8,000  [He should have sued for a larger amount. I've been on that ride.]
• Portion of U.S. river miles capable of supporting "healthy biological communities" according to the EPA: 1/5
• Percentage of personal income the average American making more than $200,000 a year gives to charity: 4.2
• Percentage the average American making between $50,000 and $100,000 a year gives: 6  [This contrast does not surprise me.]
• Portion of religious Americans who believe in reincarnation: 1/4
• Portion of nonreligious American who do: 1/4

Random Notes from a Crank

The craft beer industry has exploded the last twenty years. There's no doubt about that. You could probably go into evan an IGA grocery store and find some manner of craft brew on the shelves. But the beer that began production in 1980 by a homebrewer with dreams is a hard beer to beat still to this day, thirty-three years later. That beer is Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. A damn fine beer. And their Torpedo IPA and Ruthless Rye are outstanding. 

I started reading Lodro Rinzler's The Buddha Walks into a Bar... recently and got informed about the Four Dignities of Shambhala. As Rinzler explains them, they "are four mythical and nonmythical animals that represent different aspects of our training in wisdom and compassion. Of the real ones, they are the tiger and the snow lion. One of the mythical ones is, as you could probably guess, the dragon, but the other one is the garuda, which apparently is a creature that is part bird and part man. I don't remember reading about the garuda before, but maybe that's because I've read more in the other schools of Buddhism. 

  
So there you have it: Beer and Buddhism.

Random Notes from a Crank

What you see above is my first purchase on Ebay. That's right. I'm online shopping like it's 1999. The adult beverage inside that fine Schlitz glassware is Shiner's Farmhouse Ale, which is a pretty darn good beer. It has an effective hop profile without being IPAish (though I'm a lover of IPAs). It's their spring ale.  I recommend it if you want a lighter ale that isn't barley-forward. 

As I've written about before, I'm not much of a collector besides music and books, but I was in a colleague's office the other day, and I noticed her old rhetoric-composition books from the late 19th century and early century. I'm told I can get such textbooks rather cheap, which isn't surprising. If I were to collect anything, it would be old rhetoric-composition textbooks because I'm intrigued by how education happened in the bad/good old days. I'm on the lookout for books Barrett Wendell (Harvard), Fred Newtown Scott (U of Michigan), and Joseph Denney (Ohio State). Scott and Denney had very popular textbooks in the early 20th century. 

I haven't homebrewed in years. I'd have to check my homebrew log that I keep, but it had been at least three years I think. Now that we've cleaned up the basement in a major way, I may have to get back in the homebrewing game. Fair warning, Mrs. Nasty. 

Our little homestead got a new back fence on Saturday. A whole section of it blew down weeks ago. It looks nice, and Mrs. Nasty already has plans for planting flowers by it, which will entail me digging up more sod this spring.

Random Notes from a Crank

I tried a new beer recently. It's Shiner's Ruby Redbird. Normally, I despise any beer that has fruit in it, especially when people use limes as an adjunct in Mexican beer, especially Corona, one of the worst beers in the world. Well, there's also the beauty and horror that is Rhinelander lager, but that's another story. But I was surprised by the product out of Spoetzl Brewery in Shiner, Texas. They put ruby red grapefruit and ginger into the wort. And it works. The sourness and bitterness of the grapefruit juice works much like hops and isn't overpowering. I didn't taste any ginger at all though. It's certainly a "lawnmower beer," a summer brew that isn't heavy and seems to refresh you. I recommend the beer after doing some work outside on a hot day if you want to try something different. But you have to like grapefruit juice to like the beer. Fair warning.

On Saturday, we got a brief respite of drizzling rain here in East Central Illinois. It was just a tease to make us try to forget how screwed farmers are because of the drought. I haven't mowed my lawn in almost two months.

The Green Party selected its presidential nominee. Dr. Jill Stein will run, and the campaign qualifies for federal matching funds. As the media coordinator of the Green Party argues, "The United States desperately needs another party." In the AP story about her nomination, Stein is quoted as saying, "We need real public servants who listen to the people -- not to corporate lobbyists that funnel campaign checks into the big war chests. That's what brought me to the Green Party, the only national party that is not bought and paid for by corporate money." If she had a chance in Hades of winning, and I don't even know if she'll even be on the ballot here in Illinois, I'd vote for her.

If you're a fan of rhetoric, dark humor, and acerbic wit, read Jourdon Anderson's letter to his former master enslaver, Colonel P. H. Anderson of Tennessee.

Random Notes from a Crank

I have to personally thank Jerry Seinfeld and possibly Larry David for introducing the mantra of "Serenity Now" to me. I've been using it a lot lately. A lot.





For his birthday, my son wants the other Star Wars trilogy: episodes 1, 2, & 3. I suspect he'll be disappointed with Jar Jar's presence like I was. Even kids don't like him much.

I've never gotten the name of "Athletics" for a baseball team. I like 'em because they're small market and all that, but that franchise, if I remember correctly, started in Philadelphia, went to Kansas City for a while, then migrated to Oakland, and possibly might be moving again. But Athletics, how boring is that for a mascot? And I dislike the unnecessary apostrophe ("A's") on their hats.

I just want to lay around all day and watch baseball interrupted only by napping and people occasionally bringing me food. On occasion, I'll speak.

A good while back, heck it was over spring break in fact, Mrs. Nasty's Boss asked me if I would look over her daughter's resume because she was applying for an internship. I helped the young lady with the document, and Mrs. Nasty's Boss asked if I want anything for giving her feedback. She said if her daughter got the internship, that she'd get me something. My offhand retort was that I'll take a case of beer. Shortly thereafter, the young lady got the internship. And me, I got a twelve pack of Sam Adams Boston Lager. That's consulting, Delta Delta Style. Quintilian B. Nasty: Will consult for beer...

A Match Made in Suburbia

I'm staying here in Coralville, a town that is presently a suburban outgrowth of Iowa City, home to strip malls and hollowness. As far as I can tell, there's no there there.

But as I got back from the hospital tonight, I considered a crude arithmetic:

• Fried Pickles + Guinness + Me = Happy

The residential hotel I'm staying is not that far from the strip mall, so I walked. 

A Buffalo Wild Wings on a Wednesday night at 11pm is not a happening place. Just FYI.

But I got to watch MLB Network to see how my fantasy team is sucking while also watching the Rockies play the Dodgers. 

Music, Pabst Blue Ribbon, & Leaky Analogies

Over on Twang Nation yesterday, there was an interesting post titled "Americana Music and Craft Beer" that sidles up to making a few analogies that compare musicians to types of beer, which is a natural follow-up to concert review of Hayes Carll in which the writer quotes Carll's description of his fine tune, "KMAG YOYO."

Although I'm not all that familiar with his work but it's hard not to notice the guy because of his commercials, I found the author's description of Kenny Chesney pretty apt.

If there's a beer that exemplifies crap, it's Corona, my friends. The only way to make the stuff palatable is to put a lime in it to mask the stench.

I've also noticed, as the author relates, the popularity of PBR tall boys or 2x4s at local clubs that I've gone to.

But I drank PBR before it was cool. The hipsters have co-opted my beer of choice when I used to frequent the Flamingo in Kirksville. I mean, PBR is one part of my holy trinity of cheap, quality macrobrews.

But the author loses me a bit when he compares Carll and the wonderful Amanda Shires to brews I don't know. Even though the Chesney comparison seems appropriate, after a while, comparing musicians to beer ventures toward mental masturbation on a low order anyway. It seems like something my fraternity brothers and I might do (or did) if we were at a party that was a sausage fest.

If you look at the analogies with critical acumen, they leak just like how "leak" is a sketchy way to describe how they don't work.

Stay Positive: Smoked Beer

I got my grubby little hands on some smoked beer this weekend, and boy that stuff is good.

To many people, the idea of a beer being smoked sounds disgusting. And before I tried it for the first time, I was both intrigued and apprehensive. But I'll try about anything as beer goes, even wheat beer though I still haven't found one I've liked that much.

The O'Fallon (MO) Brewing Company offers a Smoked Porter that is pretty decent too, but the German stuff above is the best I've had.

Tall Boys

Just when I can't admire the beauty of Schlitz any more, I gain more knowledge about this wonderful beer that now is in regional circulation in its classic 60s recipe.

As related in the article, "Schlitz 'Tall Boys' Make a Comeback" (Click HERE to read it), the reformulated formula for Schlitz it now also being conveyed in helpful 16 oz. forms. Nothing of this 12 oz. shit.

The odd and somewhat troubling aspect of this marketing gambit you might have noticed if you read the article is that the original tall boy from Schlitz was 24 oz. while the retro version rolled out now is 16 oz. What gives? I guess "tall boys" are commonly known as being 16 oz. while the 24 oz. can (convenience store special) is affectionately known by some as "Two by Fours." But if the original Schlitz Tall Boy was 24 oz., why the hell is the company literally and symbolically downshifting to 16 oz.?

Think Globally, Drink Locally

Click HERE if you're interested in reading a blog post about the reasons why it's a good idea to drink locally brewed beer. I did just that when we were in South Carolina since I imbibed in some beers by the Palmetto Brewing Company.

The blogger, a guy from Indy, references two solid microbreweries: Schlafly and Market Street Brewery (Nashville).

But the one counter-argument I have with him is that many folks also like some of the mass-produced brews, such as how I have been known, on occasion, to enjoy a Schlitz, PBR, or Old Style. While I can be a bit of a beer snob and also think true beer drinkers should test their palates with local craft brews, some occasions warrant a corporate brew but hopefully not some behemoth's beer-flavored water.

And when you're hankering for some Sierra Nevada Pale Ale or a Sam Adams Boston Lager or an Abita Turbo Dog, I say drink it, man, drink it. Sure, it changed a bit during the trip to you, but it's still good stuff.

Stay Positive Wednesday: Homebrew

I write this post as I have wort boiling. I'm making an extra pale ale for the end of summer.

Homebrewing is something I've enjoyed for quite some time. A shout out to Aaron is necessary since he was the person who initially taught me the process and got me hooked.

The craft beer and microbrewery scene exploded in the 90s, but at one time homebrewing was one of the best ways to drink more full-bodied beers unless you lived in a large metro area. And it was cheaper. There's always that.

But one of the greatest aspects of homebrewing is pride. You made beer. Those of us tired of the insipid Duffs clogging up the marketplace reveled in heavier beers. And we still do.

Grocery Store Pontifications

Proper and effective bagging at grocery stores is a lost skill. But I found someone who knows what to do. Her name is Angel.

I went to the local grocery store tonight, and I was pleased that Angel sacked bags right. I use sturdy reusable bags for shopping, and Angel sacked the right way: large items, such as a gallon of ice cream or cans, on the bottom to act a base to support the softer or bruisable goods at the top.

The main culprit to this lost skill are all the damn plastic bags that take up space in our lives and float about America as detritus, symbols of our throwaway consumer culture.

I also noticed as I was checking out that a young couple, college age, was buying a six-pack of Natural Light, a beer that screams, "Buy me in a 12, 24, or 30 pack because you need that much to enjoy my alcoholic treasures."

The image of a six pack of Nattie Light is some good incongruity. A beer that needs to be drank in heavy quantities is bought in six-pack form. To which I ask, "What's the point?" If you're buying that crappy of beer, buy in bulk, my friends, buy in bulk.

Now if they would have bought a sixer of tall boys, then that's a different story. Beer, by its nature, should be quaffed in pint form.